Wow! That’s how I felt when I read this book!, February 1, 2013
p. 216 – “So this is not just a story about me and my son; everyone can benefit from finding links to events in their own lives…”
I didn’t want to believe what had happened to my baby but I saw it happen with my own eyes and when the doctor said the word “autism” I don’t remember feeling anything at all – I was just numb. I went home and watched Rain Man and Helen Keller. I thought it was my job to be Annie Sullivan – I was going to fix the autism. I really thought autism was about getting my son to sit in his chair and fold his napkin. It was like that for a long time, like declaring war on autism, compounded with other family problems. I was the mother whose son didn’t sleep through the night for nearly eight years (p.23) and broke every window in our house (Chapter 5). I also “laid hands” on my son and prayed that God would give him a new brain and I thought it was my fault when he didn’t change because I didn’t have enough faith (Chapter 11).
p.84 -“People cannot control what autism can do to their lives…What they can do is relate to their lives differently.”
Dr. Naseef teaches the truths that “people cannot control their thoughts or emotions within themselves or the universal truth that everything evolves and changes.” Some of us have been rendered powerless by the autism, but even the most challenging situations faced by families with autism are always unfolding, leaving us choices how we can respond to our suffering.
Today, my son also is safe and happy and I “stumble on happiness” when I visit him at his residential school at Bancroft in Haddonfield, NJ. When we are together he likes to write the alphabet and sing Barney songs. When my child asks me for things repeatedly that he can’t have because they cause him harm, it is now easier for me to say “no” to him. He is 19 and I still don’t know where he will live after age 21. For me and for all of the other parents with kids like mine, I am so grateful that Dr. Naseef has published again and advocates strongly for services for our children.
No matter what age your child is, if your child has autism, this book will help you. You will find understanding for yourself and the family you came from, the most up-to-date research taught in parent-ease by a masterful therapist who can and does speak to parents all over the world, some stories about other families, truths that medications and diets can only do so much to help (or not), helpful suggestions for all of us who want a loving relationship with someone with autism, and so much more.
Deb Auerbach
“The woods – of autism (mine) – are lovely, dark and deep. But I have promises to keep, And miles to go before I sleep, And miles to go before I sleep.” adapted from Robert Frost’s (1874-1963) poetry